Archive for the ‘Asanas’ Category

As I wake up this morning, there are all these emotions and thoughts and ideas… where do I start to be able to even

Prem Mandir, Vrindavan, India

convey these feelings. In only a few days, we are, once again, on our way to the mystical spiritual lands of India. It just hit me last night, after our satsang (group mediation)that we are visiting the inauguration of Prem Mandir(The Temple of Love) in Vrindavan, India.

I remember at the age of 6 or so, I ran downstairs, with the curiosity and determination a child can have, I walked into my loving father’s study, where he was buried in books and the reading of philosophy and positive thinking. With the deepest of desperations, I asked, “Dad, what is Love?”. I do not remember his answer; I do remember and do know, however, my search since. There has been plenty of moments of pain and deceit, many moments of crying myself to sleep. There have been deep moments of suffering. I have looked in many places for love and happiness, even in the most unlikely places. I did find moments, sparks, glimpses of what that means; none lasting or really satisfactory – I always knew there had to be more. The disappointments led to deeper discouragement and frustration, maybe anger. I gave up many times.

I was hearing of a student’s reflection on how difficult the practice of hatha yoga has become. At the beginning yoga was (arguably) an easy, fun, enjoyable “light” work out. But to many of us the more we become present and stay in asana, the deeper we connect. Is that something I am prepared to do? Yoga is indeed simple, though not an easy task. The more we pay attention, we find loads of thoughts and emotions. For many of us it is easier to stop, avoid, and/or look away. It is a very common reaction. I do it all the time, I do know! Through my many years of practice, I realize now it has nothing to do with that movement, that physical pain and discomfort, or frustration. It has little to do with my hips or my shoulder, or my knee. The physical body, as we have heard many times, is more than a structure of movement. The hands are to hold things, but also to let them go. The chest is to protect, but also to open up the heart and emotions. The legs and hips are the means of motion, movement in our lives, or to simply stand in place, grounded.

So, our physical yoga practice is exactly that, a practice of rediscovery, re-membering of who we are. The process of discovery is never easy. The path is full of ups and downs. We have given up uncountable times, as the yoga philosophy teaches, for uncountable (truly uncountable!) lifetimes. How are we to change in one class, or one posture, or in one month, or one year, or a lifetime? We do change, but maybe in ways we do not realize or expect now. Every breath done in consciousness changes something inside of us, every time. The questions is, are we able to sustain it? Are we able to persevere and find encouragement? Are we able to maintain focus? The is not a right or wrong answer, simple our sadhana (practice) is what matters. Some days are better than others. Some (many) days not so good. That is the nature of our imperfection, though we may choose to place blame outwardly.

So, what is the loving thing to do? What is Love? Where am I today in my trying to understand the incomprehensible? I do not understand intellectually anything more than when I was 6 in my dad’s study. Although, I know my heart has experience the incomprehensible through practice and perseverance. My heart has been graced with experiences of Love, as I know we all have. To keep those loving feelings present it takes perseverance, patience, discipline, remembrance, and know there is not an only way or only one time. It took me 40 years of experiences to view Love as a daily action, rather than the misconceived romantic ideal.

Yoga means connection, is the path of search for the purpose of our physical experience, our body as a temple of our spirit, the temple or instrument to find Love, Divine Love.

How many times we have heard that “it” has nothing to do with us. Well, I think as I get older (or wiser) I realize how these saying are even more true and real. As I sit through satsang on Friday, and I hear the words of a devotee of Radhey and Krishna explaining this, the words become just so real. Of course, I immediately think of passing these just wonderful concept to “my” yoga students.

As I understand these ideas and listen to them in my head, I can see how it all connects. We try so hard all the time to do our best. We have so many hopes and expectations and desires about the outcomes of our actions. Yes, I do this all the time. I am always hopeful that this idea or thought or action might provoke change in this or the other person or situation. I guess there is nothing wrong is wishing the best to the people we love. However, these expectations do not have to turn into attachment. Let them be. The consequences of a deep breath we hope are to trigger that deep energy inside of us, and to open the alveoli, to remove impurities from the metabolites of our cellular respiration, etc. The subtle difference is if we sit and expect, desire, attach our thoughts to that result, and we wait. Sometimes it happens, sometimes it does not. Either way, it is ok. The result is not ours to control. There are many forces that will act and affect on the result of our actions. In the Bhagavat Gita Krishna tells Arjuna (and to us all through him) that we should always do our duty, and offer our results to the Divine.

Trust and Surrender

As I reflect on this, I can think of so many times that I am not even focused on the now, but on the reactions, the effect of my actions. It is so much simpler (not always easier) to be present, to do and live this moment the best I can. The fruit of my actions will happen. I will learn as I evaluate the reactions, and do this better next time. There are plenty examples where my actions have brought undesired reactions to others. Many times it is very hurtful and difficult to see this. All I can do is try to stay humble, and try my best again. I guess, it is another lesson learned from surrendering in yoga.

It is simpler to concentrate in the now, to do our best in the moment. Just listen, be attentive, do your best in this asana. The fruit of our actions is not up to us. The intent of our action is.

From murky waters, not of murky waters

The Lotus flower is the national flower of India, as mystical as it is beautiful. Many consider this flower to be sacred, however, beyond sacred it is a powerful metaphor. The lotus can be a symbol of beauty and purity, and Divine Energy, with mesmerizing presence, anyone gets absorbed by it.

It is impossible not to evoke emotions of softness and peacefulness when looking at a lotus flower. The flower grows usually in murky ponds. One of the unique characteristics of this flower making it different from the water lilies, is that the lotus leaves grows above the water surface. The leaves of the lotus are called emergent leaves. Truly a lesson in itself.

We constantly talk in yoga about the invasion of the world around us into the world inside of us. Many times, I know I struggle with the pull and the “distractions” of the senses. It is not easy for me to maintain that constant focus in my internal remembrance of the Divine Love. Yoga also teaches us that we have seven centers of energy called chakras. These start from the tailbone area, go through the heart, the middle chakra, and finish with the crown chakra at the top of our head. The crown chakra is symbolized a lotus flower of one thousand petals.

It is comforting to think of the lotus flower to help find and maintain that balance in our lives. The flower grows, emerges, feeds, and lives of the murky water. Eventually, a beautiful delicate water emerges, with such splendor, and from an unsuspected origin. In the same way, our energy rises up, through our spine, from the lower chakras to the higher chakras, ending in the crown chakra, with the desire of the ultimate realization, God Realization.

The lesson seems simple, though no easy. We have a body, the senses, the external world, to help us. it is our job to emerge, and rise above. Our intent might be to live like the lotus flower, coming from the world, but not of the world. Our meditations may be guided by the image of a lotus flower. The soft colors, the beautiful petals, the impressive flower that opens searching, looking upwards, for that Divine Love. Its beauty does not come from the flower itself, but from its intent – reach above, humbly.

Yesterday we tried a new pose- new to me- the Albatross pose. It’s nice that a pose is named after a bird but when you try to albatross with your body it’s a whole new thing.

At first it looks simple enough. You bend over as if in uttanasana. You extend one leg behind and hold it there while balancing on the other. Then comes the tricky part: As you balance on one leg, you extend you arms to the left and right while bending in the extended leg closer to your hip AND bending down on the other leg as well. Done right it looks like an albatross. As for my asana, thankfully, I have no where to check– The yogi next to me blocks the mirror-I have only my inner feeling and thigh pain to use for assessment. How good am I at the Albatross pose? Ask my friend in front. She well tell you.

I plan to learn more about yoga poses and their names. That way I can write more accurately about our practice. I enjoy talking about the periphery of yoga–the essence minus the posture-such as feelings, peaceful moments, meditation, the challenge of living harmoniously: Over and over I have made connections with yoga as it manifests outside the class. At this point I want to refocus on asana. The reason being, the very basic physical movement sometimes releases a tide of hubris. One day, a couple of weeks ago, I experienced the mind body connection yoga makes. We were in the middle of the class and I was having trouble concentrating- no surprise. Suddenly during a hip rotation a knot came untied. I could feel the potent release of whatever it was I was holding– inside the tissue, inside my heart inside my brain. Instantly a change of state came over me and stuck with me throughout the rest of the class all the way to the drive home.

That’s why I want to study what we do. I want to learn why and how the body yields its own healing to the heart and mind. If my elbow, my knee, my shoulder, my thigh, my skin looks no different, why do I feel so much better? Where does this” bettering” start? I would like to know, and I plan to find out.

Yogini, writer/poet, teacher, irreplaceable friend!

I wish I had more to give you. Everyday, you offer me a way to silence my shuffle. God knows where this urban unrest comes from? Yet, in the soft amber light of the glowing candles we pause. Closing eyes is an option we can all take sometime. But what about the endless sinister suggestions that keep brewing a channel right down my middle? I am still rendering a new stop sign to that battle. “Give up already, I tell myself.” “No more tracking life, I admonish.” But I must keep admonishing myself. All the time.

Yesterday, your face looked beet root red. I concentrated on the trail of music, your brand of notes that lead us forward, and thought every new beginning made sense. For every new beginning makes a silent restoration of the past. Thus I paid homage to every ending note and stayed energized through every commencement. It would sure anatomize a new life. So when I glanced at your face and saw the flash of color spread across its horizon my hand rose tall and my arm lifted out from right underneath where will beats indifference. There I found my mystery buddy who awoke and responded to your daring happiness every time you raised or lowered the melody.

Just wanted to say I was there; I harmonized despite the battle and you showed mercy in flicking my flaws. Swept off my feet shall I say, by this Yoga!

Barsana Dham Yoga Retreat

Once you entered in the yoga center, you knew there was something special about this place.  The moment I saw you entering into the center, I knew there is something special about you.  The center is different, mystic, gentle, quiet and full of energy at the same time.  It is the place where we all leave our worries out, and throw ourselves in the arms of that energy in it.  It is with expectation, curiosity that you come through that door.  And I am so glad you did.  You never knew you were going to find you…

You come and participate with many words, weird words, Sanskrit words; and we chant together.  We take turns to listen to each other, to let the mind quiet down.  You let these powerful chant enter your being, and elevate your mood, prepare you for class.  Maybe you come and sit and participate, even without saying a word, with your hearts, and your own energy.  Your internal smile that breaks all barriers.  You gently close your eyes, looking inside, looking for your own truth, your heart.  You move your breath that just sits unmoved, holding keeping your deepest energy, inside.  And, you are reminded to just simply let it out, to exhale.  With that exhalation all the daily layers are peeled off, and you find your Self opened; the shoulders drop, the chest softens.  Then movement dances along with your breath.  Movement that invites muscles and nerves, bones and joints, fluids and blood, move in places you had forgotten were there.  The skin becomes alive, the senses deepen inward, and we feel moving floating, swimming in an ocean of energy; all seems intangible, maybe not logical, but equally real.

Sweat and effort come through your body.  The body takes you to places in your mind maybe forgotten.  Memories, distractions, things that were inside come running out.  The mind tries to hold on to things in the past, or expectations of the future.  The mind jumps, kicks, rebels, protests… Finally, the asanas take you deeper; you surrender.  The breath is fluent, the mind quiets down, the heart truly opens, the senses travel to unfathomable peaceful places.  We reach savasana…you let go, floating like a leaf carried but gentle wind.  Deep, imperceptible breath.

That special you that has walked through the yoga class at this little center in Houston – once or many times – has extended.  You are now everywhere.  You are in all corners of Houston, Clear Lake, Conroe, San Antonio, Austin, Galveston becoming

Enthusiastic Yogis

a doctor, Fort Davis being sharing yoga with others.  You are now in the East coast getting a better education, and the West coast pursuing your writer dreams.  You are North, way South, back in your home country.  You are in the UK, Netherlands, India, China, Colombia, South Africa, France, Costa Rica, Australia, Mexico… you are still in our hearts.  You make this yoga center.

I see this special person, walking in the yoga center.  That special heart.  That special soul, still part, connected.  I miss you.  I love you most for all that you give and that you are – really.

Namasté.

Inspiration. Don’t we all need to be inspired by something to be able to create and be moved to do. We all need that drive inside of us that awakens us. We all would like to look at life inspired, every day. We all have experienced this at one moment or another in our lives. We all have been moved to action by an incredible song, speech, story, a book, a personal hero, an experience in life.

We all have our heroes and moments and places we go for inspiration. Although, there is always that moment where we do not seem to find inspiration. I know I have been in places where I need that extra push, and do not find my Self. It is a lonely and difficult place to be. Life at that moment seems that sinks in altogether and at once. All loses perspective, and the world loses its natural brightness. Only then is when we are able to look inside and ask…humbly. Those “dark” moments are the most important movements in our lives, because from that place is when we are prone to grow, to change.

All great saints in history have had those moments. Imagine what about us simple mortals! St. Francis of Assisi called those his dark nights. The great Queen Kunti, from the Hindu tradition, used to pray to Krishna that He brought her moments on difficulty, because those were the only times she would sincerely not forget Him. So those dark nights are not a negative thing, they are our inspiration too.

Queen Kunti with Sun God Surya

Inspired, as I have heard from the author and teacher Wayne Dyer is to be “in-spirit”. We all need to remember our spirit. And it does not matter what we call that spirit, atman, soul, energy, chi. We all need to reconnect to that constantly. We do forget that we are a soul living the experience in this body. It is easier to identify ourselves with our limited exterior. We think we are our body, jobs, our bank account, our thoughts. Those are limited sources of inspiration. We have to remember, to re-member, or become members again, to reconnect to our spiritual source. There lies the source of our inspiration. Meditation, prayer, breath, silence, contemplation, etc., all these are tools to reconnect. Yoga has been the inspiration of my life, and still is. It is my moving meditation, my communication with my atman. It is through this practice that I find my inspiration to be of service to others. Be inspired…do not forget.

God doesn’t require us to succeed; he only requires that you try.
Mother Teresa

Another life lesson. We are fully engaged in making the website very interactive. All of the sudden we realized how much our expectations may always lead into disappointment. We had put all of our efforts in creating the best website for our students. We had worked so much in updating it daily, increased the volume of entries, updated the calendar, etc. Then, all of the sudden the site goes down and we are left dangling. It is disappointing to think of all the people that we know come to visit and read our entries. It may lead into frustration when we things are not under our control. But, when are they, really?

Haven’t we all experienced the same feelings?  Is this common or natural? I know even coming to the teach a yoga class with the expectation in my mind that all students come to experience the perfect class. Boy! That is a heavy burden to carry. I am not always there, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. It is always a very heavy responsibility on our shoulders when we have one of the 20 students not have a great class… It is hard to be in the moment and not fall in the trap of the false ego. It is hard to stay away from my own expectations, even the expectation to be of service to everyone. It is impossible to be all that all the time. What is it one to do?

Easier said than done. All I can do is our best every time. To show up in every circumstance, just to be there, and be opened and observant to what comes up in every breath. It is not meant to be pretty all the time. It is not meant to be easy all the time. It is not meant to make us look away, but look into. That is to practice yoga.

Perfection is an unattainable concept in this world. Perfection is a spiritual quality. We do experience glimpses of it, but they do not last here. They entangle us enough to make us believe we need more of this, our drug. That is the concept of maya in yoga. We think we need more things, another puff of a cigarette, another drink, another job title, another relationship, another drop of happiness. We are all thirsty for happiness and love.

We are in the process of making our lives more spiritual, and we will miss the mark, more often than not. Compassion and truthfulness have to be close companions. These are painful qualities that are best first applied to our own selves.

If we find ourselves so engulfed in our own ego, then love others. Service to others is the best way to make love practical. We will forget that we are or not perfect, what we lack or where we fall short. There are so many people in need around who need us. We will then realize our connectivity with others – we are nor alone. Maybe the lesson is to know that we are here together for one purpose alone, to learn to love God. Just another life lesson.

Things don’t have to be difficult to be worthwhile. What better place to learn this wisdom than in a yoga class? Anyone who attended class this past Wednesday might recall the ease with which we got into Uttanasana, not in the usual way of stretching out and bending forward from the waist, but in the reverse: Sitting down and balancing on our toes, we slowly raised an already supine waist, and found that our hands had got where they needed to be, effortlessly. I thoroughly enjoyed this delicious breeze of an extension as if I’d arrived there on a magic carpet. Usually I have to try so hard with any asana, that this easy breezy discovery of a forward bend made perfect joyful sense. Of course, we followed up with some lovely planks. Yet this feel good, rewarding beginning felt super great. Thank you so much. May we have more of these, a taste of dessert right before the actual meal?

It is amazing to see how everyone’s energy affect a yoga class. From an instructor’s perspective it is very nice to see the mind being so clearly affected by the body and breath. Time after time I see people being affected by taking the time to celebrate their connection to their physical body. I am affected by my breath and physical body.

I do not know if it is just reflexes, or a second nature from years of practice. We sat down after class and talked about with one student after class about ujjayi pranayama (breathing). This is the breath that sounds like “Darth Vader”. This breath consists of closing the back of the throat, with lips touching, mouth closed, and feel the air swirling in the mount and back of throat, as in a yawn. The simple sound of the breath and the focusing the mind into the “feeling it”, creates this intense liberating feeling inside out.  The mind has no other choice than to listen in. The senses quiet down, the body intensifies its energy and vitality. The whole system starts bringing energy from the abdomen upwards. This brings attention to the abdominal cavity and its muscles, its breath, its own bandha in the first chakra, in the pelvic area.

As I was explaining this, my entire body went into a sense of meditation and introspection. It was amazing to see how a breath may affect the intensity of our own energy. It was almost like opening a door, and an invitation to the depth of my body. 

Yoga does that for me. Makes my body react in such an intense sense of looking in.  What I find is amazing, ok, most of the time. If I simply let my self look into paramatman, the Divine waiting to be rediscovered in us. It is not us, it is that connection to the Divine living inside. It is that section of us that we recognize and acknowledge in a namaste. This only makes me humble to see that when we listen in, we can hear God inside. When we sit down, with devotion, with gratitude and love, we can feel the Divine inside. Not because He/She is inside of us, but because He/She is also inside of us. Many times, we say in class that yoga is moving meditation. Yoga really gives us chance to people that have so much going outwardly, to use the body. The body is honored through each move, each pose, each breath, as a temple for the spirit. This way we can connect to the Divine also living inside of each of us. That I see in every face after class…